Feb 28, 2007

Hump Day

This is neat. Type in your name to see how many there are of you! There are none of me but then again I do have a unique last name. There is one of me with my maiden name however!

HowManyOfMe.com
LogoThere are:
0
people with my name
in the U.S.A.

How many have your name?


If you hear an inaudible scream today in the universe during lunch, don't worry, it's just me getting a bikini wax. Oh the pain we must endure to laze on the beach. Can I get an "Owchie, Owchie OWCH"? I have never felt so high maintenance in my life. I am getting my eye brows done too, as well as a pedicure (gift from hubby for Valentine's) and my nails. Just call me Diva and get it over with.

I am trying to stay out of the stores for fear I may catch some communicable disease before we leave Saturday. But staying in the house is the equivalent of watching paint dry. Minutes stretch on like hours. I am so desperate to get out of the house that I am willing to get a bikini wax people! After several attempts of packing and unpacking, I am finally done. I have crammed as much as humanly possible into my new Pierre Cardin suitcase that I got on clearance at Winners for $50 - no wait, $36.00! It was further reduced when I got to the cash - how cool is that?

Fellow Canucks, it is that time again. Roll Up the Rim! A chance for Tim Horton's to try and pay me back for all the money I have given them throughout the years. So far they have rewarded me with a free coffee. That'll do.

Feb 26, 2007

I Must Be Gettin' Old...

In a desperate attempt to find a dress and a bathing suit for our upcoming trip, the family decided to go shopping in Ottawa yesterday. I must now tell you that it is official.

I am old.

Every store I went into had BLARING music in it, so bad that I had to walk out. Because when I listen to really annoying music that has no real riffs or verses that make actual sense, I start to twitch uncontrollably and my eyes go cross-eyed. I beg of you, how can you shop with your eyes crossed? American Eagle was the worst offender. The music was so loud in that store that I had to yell, and I mean yell "LET'S JUST GET OUT OF HERE!!" No sale American Eagle! I mean, come on, it's not a night club - you may actually have to converse with someone at some point.

I did not end up finding a dress for my brother's wedding because of the fact that it is EXTREMELY DIFFICULT to find a sun dress in the dead of winter. I may wear my new bikini instead. :)

I got to spend some quality time with a 'lil miracle baby today. :) My dear friend Katherine had Callum a month premature in December and he was just a smidge under 3 pounds when he was born. They really didn't think he'd make it through that first night. Well, here he is - a whopping 7 pounds, 12 ounces now, just a doll! Made my uterus hurt...but alas, no more babies for me.


Feb 22, 2007

I'm Still Alive!

Wow, I haven't really blogged since last Saturday. The well is dry! I have tried to write more than once but nothing came to me and I ended up walking away in disgust thinking, "Man, if I got paid for doing this I'd be fired!"

Hubby and I have been watching American Idol and if Lakisha doesn't win, I'll be mad. I loved her the moment I first saw her. You go girl! We noticed some of the other girls with less talent have a lot of attitude, funny how that works, huh? Karma will always win out in the end though.




I am really looking forward to getting away in a little over a week. I am pretty much packed and ready to go - and as Tom Petty sings, "The waiting is the hardest part". Hopefully when we come back Spring will start, I know, wishful thinking...

I've been cooking and baking up a storm, which is totally not like me! lol Bread, pizza, baked beans, cookies, cake, another batch of cinnamon buns today -gosh, you'd think I was pregnant! (I'm not) I guess that's what winter is for - I don't do half as much in the summer. Gosh, I can't wait for barbequing again. Bring on the heat!


Please forgive me y'all - I'm all tapped out creatively and this post is getting more and more pathetic. Just thought I'd write something though so you know that I'm not stuck in a snow bank somewhere. :) Happy Thursday!

Feb 17, 2007

Will Somebody Please Help This Girl!


After checking herself out of a short stint in rehab, Britney Spears decided to shave her head bald and get some tattoos. If this does not define self-destructive behaviour, I don't know what does. I pray this girl gets help - and fast.


And now for something totally different:

Mashed potatoes - who doesn't love them? I mean, what's not to love, smooth silky potatoes mixed with butter and milk? Yum! I am a product of two Dutch parents so it's in me to love them - it's in my blood! My son loves 'em too - but Elle not so much - I just don't get it. During dinner the other night I noticed she was not touching this mashed magnificent wonder sitting on her plate so I did what any desperate Mom would do to get her 9 year old to eat potatoes. I leaned over close and whispered in her ear "Eating potatoes makes your boobies grow". After 5 minutes of hysterical laughter that child ate every last bit on her plate. She even tried to eat the leftovers while simultaneously eating the chocoltae cake I gave her for dessert. Potatoes are her new love! Shortly aftter dinner she kinda scared me by asking for some potato chips. Woah Nellie! I fear I may have a wild child on my hands....

Feb 15, 2007

Another Name Game

These are really fun. This one is a bit different from the last one I tried, plus I added a few of my own in for good measure:

YOUR REAL NAME:
Joy

YOUR GANGSTA NAME (1st 4 letters plus izzle):
Joyizzle

YOUR DETECTIVE NAME (fave color + fave animal):
Pink Dolphin

YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME (middle name + childhood street):
Anne Dead End Road (!)

YOUR STAR WARS NAME (last 3 letters of your last name + first 2 letters of your first name + first 3 letters of Mom's maiden name):
Zacjodeb

YOUR SUPER HERO NAME (2nd fave color + fave drink):
Black Cosmo

YOUR IRAQI NAME (2nd letter of your first name + 3rd letter of your last name + any letter of your middle name + 2nd letter of your Mom's maiden name + 3rd letter of your Dad's middle name + 1st letter of a sibling's first name + last letter of your Mom's middle name):
Ocaebvr

YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION PROGRAM NAME (Grandma/Grandpa's first name + Jones):
Greta Jones

YOUR GOTH NAME (Black + name of one of your pets):
Black Wilbur

YOUR AMERICAN IDOL NAME (fav car and sea food)
Benz Shrimp

NAME OF YOUR DREAM BAND (name of computer + printer):
Acer Packard

MOVIE STAR NAME (sibling's middle name + mother-in-law's maiden name):
Anthony Wolf

YOUR ALTER EGO NAME (name of one your childhood pets + popular brand of clothes when you were young):
Snoopy Jordache

YOUR LAWYER NAME (fav actor's last name + fav hard liquor):
Clooney Vodka (would you hire him?)

and finally,

YOUR HIP HOP NAME (fav candy + fruit):
Swedish Berry Coconut

Feb 14, 2007

Happy Valentine's Day, Need a Hug?

*O.K. a quick update: I am stealing (again!) this idea from mamaliscious blog - in honour of Valentine's Day she posted the video "Let's Get it On" by Marvin Gaye. Don't you just love Marvin Gaye??? Here's another one of my fav's from him:



I borrowed this most excellent idea from socalmuchacha. I love this video, it warms my heart.


I think Valentine's Day was designed for couples who are dating - a chance to show each other how much they care. When you're married, you know how much your husband or wife cares. You don't need to spend $100 on roses and a totally inflated restaurant bill to do so. Hubby and I being the rebels that we are, usually dine out the night after and save some bucks. I mean, I don't need retailers telling me when I need to be romantic with my husband, I can figure that out all by myself.


We've got a big winter storm happening here today so the buses were cancelled - yay, I thought I would get to sleep in. Nope! The kids got up at 7:20 anyway and then got Wilbur going which is the equivalent to letting 40 children with A.D.D. loose through a candy store that's made out of glass. While they weren't watching he ripped into all of Ellie's valentine's for school. She had painstakingly placed 5 candy hearts in small sealed bags and he - just as painstakingly - ripped open each one, stealing the candy only. The dog annoys me to no end. Good thing he's cute.

Feb 12, 2007

Permission to be Petty, Again


Many things bother me about this photo. Like, the fact that Katie Holmes seems like a giant towering over Mary J. Blige and her husband, Tom. She's ginormous! Second, what is that mushroom-top thing she is wearing? I think because she's been to a few fashion shows in Paris that she thinks she should be the poster child for haute couture in the U.S. Third, Tom Cruise looks down right scary. Like a caricature of himself. Is it me, or does he get crazier looking every day?



O.K. One more thing about the Anna Nicole Smith story. This lawyer dude, her 'loving companion' or whatever he wants to call himself. This guy is the lowest of the low. Like a snake. Right after Anna's death, he hops a plane to the Bahamas to scoop up the child who is so obviously not his. And who does he take with him in his deepest, darkest grief? Well, Mark Steines and an Entertainment Tonight camera crew of course! He was reportedly paid 1 million dollars to be on ET, and have them film his emotional reunion. I don't who's worse - him, for taking them along - or them for going! What a circus.

Whichever Olsen twin this is...I can never tell them apart. Ummm, you stole my look from 1982! What is with these girls? They've got all the money in the world and they dress like this? What's up with that? I can buy an exact pair of these sunglasses at the Dollar Store - BUT I DON'T!


MSN asks: "Do the rich have better sex lives?" Well, seeing they don't have to worry about paying their monthly utility bills, car payments, mortgages, insurance costs, or worry about putting their children through school, or ANYTHING HAVING TO DO WITH MONEY, than yeah, I guess they would.

This is cool. I love making her say really stupid things in an english accent.


Men, now you can truly REJOICE!

Oh, just one more thing...
Honey, please don't buy me this chocolate for Valentine's Day.

Feb 9, 2007

TGIF and a Girls Dinner Out At Last!

Dinner out with 'the girls' tonight as we have a birthday to celebrate. Heather will be turning 29, again. We haven't been out in ages and I am so anxious for this night to begin. A night filled with laughter, great conversation, food being served to us, hence no dishes (yay!) and a couple of alcoholic drinks thrown in for good measure. I mean, really, what could be better?

Hubby and I got sucked into the vortex that is Costco yesterday. (what else is there to do in -30 weather?) We decided to make it legal and get our own membership card (thanks Sharon for lending us yours - which we still have btw!) I don't think they could have taken worse pictures of us - we look like hardened criminals on a day pass. Just under one hour and over $300.00 later we made our way home, stunned by the power that a warehouse store has over us. (Chunks, do you agree?)

I got my hair cut on Wednesday. Took over 2 inches off the length and wanted layers in there to give it some ooomph. Well, I always seem to leave my hairdresser dissatisfied. He took over 2 inches off, but left me with a sort of Dorothy Hamill look. Well, not that short, but you know what I mean. After my morning shower today, I desperately tried to cut some layers myself. And this is where I am going to tell you all NEVER TO DO THIS. Never under any circumstances should you try to cut your own hair. After seeing the carnage in the sink below me I desperately called my hairdresser and begged him to take me out of 1979. He obliged and fit me in this afternoon. Another hairdresser looked at me today when I came in and asked "Didn't you just get them cut?" Them? You mean, my hair? I mean, hairs? As in plural? Ah, the French can be funny that way. They like to refer to their head of hair as "them". Weird. I like to refer to my hair as a collective group but that's just me.

Well, speaking of my hair, I'd better go get "them" ready to go out! Cheers!

Feb 8, 2007

Anna Nicole Smith

This is very sad news.
Last night, I was watching ET and I saw yet another interview with Anna Nicole Smith and I thought to myself - that girl is under a lot of pressure from the media and she seems as though she is severely depressed. She was monotone and withdrawn, and seemed to be slurring, perhaps from too much self-medication. Afterwards I had this horrible feeling that something was going to happen - that she was going to end it all. It certainly seems that way to me, anyway. I was not the biggest Anna Nicole fan but I felt for her. Three days after giving birth to her daughter she lost her son, and then had to deal with the press relentlessly hounding her over the paternity of her newborn. According to the media - this was relevant news. Why couldn't they have just let her grieve and attend to her own personal business? Jeez, this world we live in is so screwed up.

Feb 5, 2007

pms

It never ceases to amaze me the depths of emotions, the enormous highs and lows, a woman can go through. Sure, pms doesn't help this roller coaster of emotions. Tonight it's a low for me. There are many contributing factors...life, bills, kids, work - you name it, it's buggin' me. And pms can make me feel as though I am trapped in a body that I don't want to be in. I snap at the kids, the dog, poor old hubby - I am generally miserable with myself as well. My brain has lucid moments where I wish I could be rational, but the irrational side wins out. I must ride that crazy roller coaster until it stops. Until such time, I am strapped in against my will. But perhaps, these outbreaks are needed. Maybe without them I would boil over and self-combust? Maybe I need these outbursts to keep sane. Who knows? It can be very frustrating to try to explain to a man how this works. "Well, you see honey, at the same time every month I become a different woman, some months may be worse than others, but generally I become an irrational, moody and very angry woman. And there's absolutely nothing I can do about it." This directly translated to a man: "Blah blah blah, blah blah - blah blah."

Like an insane person, anything can set me off. And I can either bet set off in an angry way, or a very emotional way. Take your pick, both can be equally bad. The angry way involves an inordinate lack of patience along with the inevitable, and most often involuntary - rolling of the eyes in response to anything I deem worthy. (which is literally everything) Add to that a few slamming of doors and guttural "ugh's". Tears can also be involved but are not often showed.

The emotional reaction is worse. It involves letting yourself feel pain you don't usually let in. It makes your heart physically heavy and clouds your eyes from tears that seem to steadily flow out of nowhere. It brings up every hurt, every scar, every hidden-away pain to the surface and brings mind numbing relevance to the simple word 'sad'. It makes me long for my brother who I lost in October 2004. It makes that cut seem so fresh and un-healed, as though over 2 years of grieving have seemed like a mere day. It makes me worry for my children, as if worrying will keep them safe. It makes me romanticize the past, as if it were free from trouble. It makes me fret about the future, as if I had any control over it. The tears come freely and only they decide when they will stop. And when they do, they leave puffy eyes as proof that they were there. A tattle-tale of tears as it were.

So, I ride the roller coaster, hanging on for dear life, or what certainly seems like dear life to me at the time. I look longingly at the calender knowing that in just a few short days I will be myself again. I will see things more clearly, my rationality will be returned to me and I will regain my optimism. And I will return to being the pms I enjoy - pretty much sane.

Monday Musings

Wow, yesterday marked my 300th post blogging about nothing. Let's keep up the momentum, shall we?

It is that dreaded time of year again. The time where I wish I could bury my head in the sand and keep it there indefinitely. Science Fair Project time. Just typing those words sends shivers down my spine. Again, I am calling upon my sister's expertise in this area as she loves to work on these types of things. Why, I don't know. We are complete and polar opposites in this area. The same thing that gives me a migraine headache excites her to the point of creative genius.


Hubby and I rented Who Killed the Electric Car on the weekend. If you want to watch a documentary that will get your blood boiling inside your veins, this one is it. It is heart-breaking to watch actually. It follows the creation of a zero-emissions electric vehicle that posed such a threat to the big oil companies that it was disposed of. The most maddening fact of the documentary - a battery was developed for the electric car that could enable you to drive 300 miles on a single charge. A HUGE breakthrough as consumers were worried that electric cars couldn't hold enough of a charge to drive long distances. General Motors bought the patent for it and then promptly sold it. To Texaco. And guess what? Surprise of all surprises, this battery became dead-in-the-water.

Unfortunately I am not a big football fan but I did flip the channels a couple of times last night to see thousands of people pay hundreds of dollars to sit out in the driving rain to see the Super Bowl. Why, for the love of Pete, do they not hold this prestigious event in a stadium with a ROOF OVER TOP OF IT??? If you think about the millions of dollars being spent, would this not seem like a good idea instead of having hoards of fans leave during the half time show? And poor Prince - he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted when he was out there singing! And btw, what was that thing he had on his head during his first song? It looked like something Lucille Ball wore in I Love Lucy!


The weather here is deplorable. Despicable. Miserable. Wretched! Minus 40 with the wind chill. Hope it's warmer where you are!

Feb 2, 2007

Linkage, Baby

Prepare yourselves. I am about to over-use the exclamation point. But I assure you, it's worth it.

Ummm, DUH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Listen up buddy. Go to jail. Directly to jail. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.00.


Ford, do you know why THIS is happening? It's because you install ANNOYING *INCREDIBLY LOUD* DING-ERS that DING if you don't put your seat belt on within 30 seconds. And keeps dinging until you do. I am a big girl now Ford, you don't have to tell me when to put my seat belt on. And one more thing, when my windshield wash is empty, I know that too. You needn't remind me every 4 minutes as though I am deaf, dumb, mute and a COMPLETE IDIOT.

Ladies, all I can say is OWWWW!

Poor girl. This is when you need therapy, to get help from the therapy you had.

Feb 1, 2007

Did the Pringles Can Get Smaller or Did My Fist Get Bigger?

Who can actually fit their hand into a Pringles can? I swear one day my hand will get stuck and then I will be forever known as "Crazy Pringle Lady". These are things I worry about...

With my on-going love affair to bake with yeast, I was inspired by savvycityfarmer to make my own pizza dough.

Deep dish baby!

Topped with red and green pepper, red onion, Cremini mushrooms and a blend of mozzarella, cheddar and Parmesan cheese. Yumm-o! And she was right, we may never order take-out again! If you're interested you can find the recipe on her blog.

January has finally come and gone - good riddance I say! February is manageable because it is a short month and then once we muddle through March, Spring will be well on it's way! Woo-hoo!